The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

MS. DoRIGHT

“Ms. DoRight, I am the sort of person who always blesses people, even strangers, when they sneeze. I am also the sort of person who values silence in a library. The other day, I witnessed a young man with terrible allergies sneeze five or six times, and then wipe his snot all over the library books.”

Ms. DoRight,

I am the sort of person who always blesses people, even strangers, when they sneeze. I am also the sort of person who values silence in a library.

The other day, I witnessed a young man with terrible allergies sneeze five or six times, and then wipe his snot all over the library books.

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Even though I normally bless people, I couldn’t bring myself to do the same for him. In this case, would it be appropriate to tell him to get out of the library and risk breaking my own rule of silence?

Bless you,

Shhh!

—————————————————–

Shhh,

You’re right, sneezing etiquette can be a difficult subject. Some people find it offensive to be blessed, whereas others think they are entitled to a blessing every time they sneeze.

The hard truth is that there’s no happy medium to this unfortunate situation. Some people can’t help but sneeze all the time. Even though you can’t help someone with this problem, you can help them focus on their sneezing manners.

Chronic sneezers should carry around handkerchiefs, especially when their sneezes produce inordinate amounts of snot.

If ever you find yourself in the library again with the prolific sneezer, it might be rude to ask him to leave, but it wouldn’t be rude to give him dirty looks or casually set a box of tissues beside him.

However, although sneezing seems like something that happens to everyone, there are oftentimes specific reasons for the onset of a sneezing attack.

It could be snatiation, a medical disorder characterized by uncontrollable bursts of sneezing, usually brought on by a full stomach.

Snatiation is an acronym that stands for Sneezing Non-controllably At a Time of Indulgence of the Appetite – a Trait Inherited and Ordained to be Named.

Maybe your library sneezer has snatiation, in which case it would be rude to yell at him. However, snatiation or not, it’s not right to wipe snot on things that aren’t yours.

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