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The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

Ms. DoRight

“Ms. DoRight, Christmas is coming up and that means I have to meet my boyfriend’s family. I’m pretty nervous about meeting his parents. He tells me they’re really conservative. I have blue hair, two rings in each eyebrow, a nose ring and visible tattoos. Would it be polite if I took out all my jewelry? I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not, but I don’t want to offend them.”

Ms. DoRight,

Christmas is coming up and that means I have to meet my boyfriend’s family. I’m pretty nervous about meeting his parents. He tells me they’re really conservative. I have blue hair, two rings in each eyebrow, a nose ring and visible tattoos. Would it be polite if I took out all my jewelry? I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not, but I don’t want to offend them. What should I do?

Thanks,

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Freak

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Freak,

The easiest way to avoid an uncomfortable holiday situation with your boyfriend’s parents is to buy them great presents.

You might want to shy away from overdoing it with the material goods, though. Instead, donate money in their name to a great charity, or plant them a tree. Even though you might look like a total oddball, they will think you have a heart of gold.

If you have visible tattoos, wear long sleeves. If his parents are conservative, there’s nothing wrong with hiding your less conservative parts. Doing that does not make you someone you’re not; it makes you a conscientious person.

During the holidays, when all else fails, people usually rely on alcohol to liven things up. However, alcohol also acts as a truth serum, so watch out for that.

If you drink a little too much eggnog, try to remember that your boyfriend’s family might not want to hear about the time you danced naked for Girls Gone Wild after you drank 18 beers and eight Purple Hooter shots.

If your boyfriend’s family goes to a church service on Christmas Eve, remember to respect their beliefs. Don’t show them the tattoo of Jesus Christ on your chest. No one, not even God, wants to see that.

Also, no matter how much you dislike fruitcake, eat it if your boyfriend’s parents offer you some. After you eat it, tell them it is the best you’ve ever had.

Most of all, don’t tell your boyfriend’s little sister that Santa Claus is not real. She’ll figure it out on her own soon enough, she doesn’t need you around to destroy her illusions.

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