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The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

The Editorially Independent Voice of The University of Akron

The Buchtelite

Spring Break hook up turns into a stage 5 clinger

“Ms. DoRight, I need to know how to get rid of someone that I don’t want around. I hooked up with this girl over spring break, and we had a pretty good time, for what it was worth. Well, by the time I got back to Ohio on Saturday night, she had called my cell phone seven times.”

Ms. DoRight,

I need to know how to get rid of someone that I don’t want around.

I hooked up with this girl over spring break, and we had a pretty good time, for what it was worth.

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Well, by the time I got back to Ohio on Saturday night, she had called my cell phone seven times.

She actually goes to UA and I didn’t even know that.

What’s worse is that she is also in my economics class and I just never paid attention to her.

She even tried to send me relationship requests on Facebook.

What the hell should I do?

Thanks,

Stud

Stud,

The best thing you can do is to get the hell out of Dodge as fast as humanly possible.

If you hooked up with a girl, the authorities will be knocking on your door faster than you can say underage.

Perhaps that was only a misogynistic mistake and what you meant to say was that you hooked up with a woman.

People make that mistake all the time.

That doesn’t make it OK.

Think back to spring break, all of last week.

Was there maybe something you said to your hook-up that would lead her to believe that the two of you had a relationship?

There are two rules for meeting strangers.

First, don’t have sex with a stranger.

Second, don’t give a stranger your phone number, especially if you’ve just had sexual relations with said stranger and don’t want the stranger calling you and trying to be your Facebook girlfriend.

The big question here is, how did you not know this woman was in your economics class?

Honestly, you don’t seem very bright.

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